Hopeless Romantic

Every time I fall in love I feel like I am in prison. Imprisoned by the thought of making every relationship I have been to work out just fine. That's the reason why I am trying to endure every hardship and pain. I am a risk-taker. Many times I have failed and got hurt, but I did not stop. I have taken more complicated situation and the risks along with it, even suffered from the consequences. Never have I been regretful about it because those moves were my choices, something I have decided upon. I am not proud about it either. I learned from it most probably but never did I swear of not doing things again. Perhaps, I am a dreamer or an illusionist I may say.  I could also be that idealistic woman, envisioning things in its greatest sense no matter how hard it could be. I remember a line in a movie I have seen with the leading lady saying "I am neither a whore nor a slut or a hooker; I am just a diehard romantic".  She has the personality being misinterpreted by people who think that she is a playgirl but she's not; till she met a man who has became her last and final love-the man who chose to live with her for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, till death pull them apart. As what a popular quote says "I don't care who became your first what's important is that I am your last".  With that I am still hoping that somebody will come to catch me when I fall, to listen to my sometimes non-sense thoughts, to believe in my capabilities, to understand my tantrums, to accept the real me - anything that I am, not wanting me to become what he wants me to become. Haizt! Perceptibly I am now turning to becoming a hopeless romantic.